The Minute I Looked Up

I'm sure you've already braced yourself for either (a) a commentary on some sort of divine spiritual revelation or (b) a self-deprecating anecdote about getting smacked in the face with a baseball that could potentially have flown my way at this weekend's Spikes game. Though both may have enriched your life in profound ways, you're not getting either (don't worry...I'll give you plenty of reasons to laugh at my expense eventually).

{Every so often, I like to go to the window, look up, and smile for a satellite picture.}  Stephen Wright

If someone's looking down it generally means they're ashamed, they're sorry, or they're trying to cover the fact that they're actually not sorry:

-If you made a mistake, admit it. If you're genuinely sorry, apologize openly and honestly.  Getting defensive serves nobody; you're not kidding anyone, including yourself. No amount of self-justification fixes the problem, and sometimes it's more relieving to just accept the burden of responsibility and apply your energy to finding a really big Band-Aid.

-If you're not sorry, don't apologize! If you made a conscious decision to think or act a certain way, don't hide behind an excuse. Carry yourself with assuredness, stand your ground, and support your opinions. (Note: It's also not always necessary to justify your actions.  Sometimes it's fair to simply state your decision, without trying to explain it away to people.)

-If you feel ashamed, change your outlook (for feelings of guilt about making a mistake or anxiety about hiding behind an excuse, see above).  For feelings of embarrassment or self-consciousness, look up.  Everyone has had a bad day (one of those I'd-rather-try-to-navigate-my-way-through-the-arctic-tundra-with-a-Qtip-than-see-someone-I-know-right-now days).  Of course, that's when your love interest from 7 years ago rounds the corner into the coffee shop you're currently occupying (Wasn't he working on a different continent? Who knew?!) Take the blinders off, look up, and say hello. On the other end of this scenario, how many times have you even noticed your friend was in his sweaty gym clothes? You were just happy to see him, right?

When you spend all your time looking down, you're missing out on the beautiful world and captivating people around you. By the time you have the humility to honestly admit your failures, the confidence to stick up for yourself, and the perspective to remember you don't live in a vacuum--by the time you're ready to make eye contact with the world, you will have missed it. 

Looking up reminds you that there are other people. They're going through their own trials, tribulations, celebrations...happies and sads, Dad would say. Isn't it great to have someone insert one tiny little moment of fabulousness into your life, unexpectedly? The guy who left a tip on my table yesterday despite the fact that I'm not actually a "waitress"--the restaurant manager who refused to let my friend pay for lunch because he appreciated the conversation we had with him on his break--the random stranger who offered a compliment that can only be genuine because it's just THAT random...I look up to those people.

On a lighter note, I had to use up the rest of the scallops and green beans.  Take 2 was definitely better...scallops and portobello mushrooms sauteed in olive oil and seasoned with curry.  I ate the green beans raw, drizzled with a tiny bit of tamarind concentrate. Good way to end the day.

Have a great today,

Rachel